Tuesday, September 26, 2017

an evening in the park.

I wish I could say we have these super cool, amazing, glorious parks like in the movies, but no. And really, it's fiiiiine! What we do have, is the okayest park that's actually just minutes away. I'll take it!

Brennen received some early birthday money last week and decided he needed to spend it on Amazon. So he bought a boomerang. Yes. A boomerang! It came today. And once Dad starting looking at the instructions, he realized it was competition boomerang. Did you even know there was such a thing? I didn't. It really tells you how much I rely on photos on Amazon versus the description. Don't be like me.

Either way, Toby was all... I wanna take this to the park right now (you have to have a 100ft of clearance all around you). So we loaded up and went. And ya'll, it was actually chilly out!!!! (Do you hear the angels?!)

So here are our photos from the evening. Til I got cold and went to the van.

And y'all should know me well enough to know that I took full advantage of this opportunity and snapped some photos of my only girl.

Her mullet game is strong.

First catch reactions. It really didn't take them long to master the boomerang!

Her face when she sees a hole in the tree and believes there's a dead beetle in there.

Goodness, me. She melts me. 


Tuesday, August 8, 2017


Every now and then, I get caught up in this comparison trap. And worrying about who actually likes me and who doesn't. And if I measure up in this way or that way. And most of the time, I can quickly recognize that this is what I'm doing and squash it. Remind myself where my value is (in Jesus) and then I can easily and quickly quit giving a flying flip about who I do NOT measure up to based solely on who I am as a human. But a couple weeks back, I felt the Lord gently tug on my heart and open my eyes. I was letting myself get caught up again.

And here's where the dumb disclaimer lies: THIS IS *MY* STORY. I AM IN NO WAY SAYING YOU SHOULD DO WHAT I DO. THIS IS *MY* THING.
Okay, so I was getting caught up: was my makeup enough? were my shoes enough? how about my clothes? and what about my nails? None of these questions were me asking myself... "hey Self, what do you think about you? Self, do we like our nails this way? Do we like shoes like this? Also, Self, how we reealllly feelin' about this face full of makeup?" No. I was comparing myself to others and not truly realizing it til the tug on my heart strings alerted me. Thanks, Holy Spirit, I needed it.

So I stopped dead in my tracks and I DID ask myself all those questions. Who am I trying to please? Who am I concerned about? What difference does it make if I don't look TOP NOTCH every darn day? I like ME. I like who I am (most of the time). I like who I was designed to be. My family never asks why my makeup isn't perfect or why my hairs are crazy or if those shoes are the current style. No, actually, they just love ME. And humbling enough, I've had to wear "granny shoes" all summer because of some weird foot condition that dictates I either wear socks or leather, so I chose Wal-Mart sandals with leather soles. They are super comfy, and at first, I was like... Um. This will be looked down on.
I know.

But then on Sunday (because church) I wore shoes that only made my sad feet hurt even more. I was suddenly caught up. Did they look cute? SHOOT YEAH! But did I wear them for me? Nope. I wore them because it's what other people are wearing. And I needed to measure up.

And yesterday, I let it happen again. Knowing where I was going, I put on a full face of makeup. And even as I was doing it, I realized, it was not for me. It was not for my family. It was not for Jesus. It was for making sure I was judged properly by others. So dumb, and I knew it, but just couldn't stop myself. I immediately washed it off after I was home.

What do *I* like? I like mascara, blush, and lips. I like looking natural. *I* like it. And the Lord pressed on me weeks ago, to stop worrying about it and do what I feel is right between Him and me. So I did. Til yesterday. And I went to bed with all of this on my mind, praying for a refreshed vision of who He says I am. I woke this morning with a fresh, blank face. I added mascara, blush, and lipstick, because it's what I like. I put on my flowy, non-form fitting dress.

What else do I like? Flats. Sandals that are flat. Shoes that are flat. Wedges are fun, but I feel like I can't do anything meaningful in them. I like flat, strappy sandals.

I like my loose comfy clothing. I like stretchy clothes, even if they don't make me look thinner. I don't care about looking thin. I mean.... I'll be honest, I'm struggling with being the "fat girl" in my circles right now, but also, I want to be comfortable, because that's what *I* like right now. Comfort.

I also like pleasing the Lord, and not man. I like being who I am without the stupid comparison. This morning, after my quiet time, my out loud words were this:

My worth is not in my face.
My worth is not in my shoes
My worth is not in my appearance.
My worth is not in my ministry.
My worth is not in my LuLaRoe business.
My worth is not even in motherhood or wifey-ness.

My worth is in Jesus.
My worth is in Jesus.
My worth is in Jesus.

I want to be aligned with Him and how he made me. Which means, I stop this silly comparison to other humans right now. Time is essentially wasted when I spend it wondering if I measure up. Because, really? I DO measure up. I measure up to the Holy One, the One who sacrificed EVERYTHING to allow me to be worthy.

Your struggle may not be where mine is, and THAT IS OKAY. We weren't created the same. Not visually, creatively, physically, mentally, emotionally. I do things differently than the next person. My personality is different than others, FOR SURE. And that is amazing! You do you, and find your value and your worth in Jesus alone.

Say it with me: comparison is dumb and super unproductive and does not please the Lord.

YOU are beautiful.
YOU are amazing.
YOU are strong.
YOU are YOU.
And YOU are full to the brim of worth and value in Jesus our Savior.
Be who He made you.


Tuesday, July 11, 2017

ten on ten // july 2017

Another month, another Ten on Ten.

{waiting for breakfast}

{strawberry and milk snack}

{new cart orginization. I decided to start using it for my Bible and journaling stuffs}

{afternoon Jesus pick me up}

{in a messed-up-thyroid funk}

{doodling and painting and music playing}

The end.

Because my camera battery died, and then I had to do some hard adulting, so I forgot to pick my camera back up. I tried. Six of ten is better than zero any day of the week.

Thanks for following along.


Friday, July 7, 2017

succulent garden + treasures.

If you follow me on instagram, you've already seen this, BUT, I'm back to documenting more and blogging more, so, I'm posting in my little space of the interwebz what I've already shared on insta.

I have always wanted a cute little succulent garden, a smallish one with different kinds. But I like to kill things like plants, so I've just put it off forever. I've also been to the PNW three times and collected treasures each time. I have lost some of them because the kids broke the glass my sea glass was in then just swept it right up with the broken jar pieces and dumped them into the trash. 😭 And the other jar was broken by a rogue illegal frisbee move. (why do kids like to throw things like that inside the house? **fist to sky**)

So I was at Wal-Mart because I had gotten fed up with our laundry sitch: laundry laying all over the garage floor and always in a giant pile. I went to pick up a couple of laundry sorters to make my life easier. I decided on a whim I'd go look at the plants and see if they had any cutie succulents. I had two at home already from my local grocery store, so I just wanted a few more to get an odd number in there. I couldn't decide what I wanted to put my baby garden in, but knew I wanted glass, so I went to floral and found a low sitting glass bowl. I also found the cutest door mat. Fun facts: I've never purchased a cute door mat before this day!

So I looked around floral a little more trying to decide how I was going to layer it with dirt, and ultimately decided I had everything in my backyard. I used those shimmery white stones (that's their latin name) for the bottom, and earlier, it hit me that this would be the perfect way to store my Washington beauties so I can display them and see them somewhere pretty and functional. So that's what I did. Succulent garden + PNW treasures = 😍. It isn't fancy, but it's perfect for me.

Also, Ruby grabbed one of my plant babies before I had them planted and spilled dirt in her mouth and all over her face, and in the meantime, she knocked some petals? leaves? what are they? off of a couple plants, so I'm going to read how to properly propagate them, because last time I went trolling the garden center's floor for fallen succulent limbs, I somehow killed them all after I got them home.

I'm kind of a terrible gardener. But! I have photographic evidence that I did something pretty with a couple of succulent plants and some sea treasures. I'll let you know in a couple of weeks if my babies are still alive, or if my black thumb killed them.

And here's a pretty color edit, just for funsies.


Thursday, July 6, 2017

first dress up.

So my mom decided our darling lady baby needed something to dress up so she sent us a princess fairy dress up costume. Though, I keep calling her a butterfly princess! Either way, she loved it and looked absolutely adorable. It was good for my soul to see her running around in a tutu and a flower crown and butterfly wings. I've been the yell-y mom lately. So dang much. Even Greyson told me the other day, "Mom, I wish you didn't yell so much." Me, too, buddy. I've made a terrible habit of it.

Anyways, here's my girl. My girly girl. 😍



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