Tuesday, February 9, 2010

today


Today has been a slightly busy day. Today I got both boys off to school nearly LATE. Today I dropped off my medicaid paperwork and found out that Toby's insurance DOES NOT HAVE MATERNITY COVERAGE. Today I enjoyed a FREE Grand Slam Breakfast from Denney's. so good. Today was my first doctor's appointment for this new little one. Today the doctor joked about how he ALWAYS has a lot of deliveries around Labor Day and how he finds it so funny :). Today I got my official due date. September 10th. Today I took a teensy 20minute nap. Today I scheduled my first ultrasound for the 18th. And Today, I was told to STOP BREASTFEEDING! what?!?! I've read tons of stuff online that suggests it is just fine to nurse while pregnant. But because I am not a rule breaker, I feel I must do what my doctor has recommended and stop nursing...one month sooner than planned. Yick. I don't wanna. Jonyn doesn't either. He's pretty attached to that nursing business. I don't blame him. He's been doing it for nearly 11 months now. I'm pretty attached too. It's his comfort. It's my comfort too. But I guess now I will wean him. Also, him and his little sibling will be around 18months apart. I love that. But you know what? I have yet to feel any real emotions about this pregnancy. I'm afraid to. I'm afraid to start loving and dreaming. I'm scared to feel happy and excited and all those feel-good emotions. Something could still go wrong. It's really hard not to worry. I'm trying to let it all be in God's hands, I really am. I'm trying to let him have full control. It's hard. So hard. The way I'm feeling right now is I'm excited about the POSSIBILITY of having another child. Yes, I've said we're very excited, that's because I'm sure we will be once we get to see the little peanut and hear a heartbeat. But for now, I'm keeping my emotions centered around the possibilities. So anyways, I feel like I rambled and it's possible I sound confused.... sorry about that. It happens sometimes.

Overall, today has been a good day. The constant nausea.... not so good. Except that it gives me a little bit of hope that things are just fine...

2 comments:

  1. Brooke, if you don't feel that it's time to stop nursing yet, I would highly suggest that you reconsider following what the doctor recommends. In most cases it's perfectly safe to continue nursing during a pregnancy, and I've known several women who've nursed throughout an entire pregnancy, and then tandem nursed the newborn and toddler. If it's not medically necessary, and you and Jonyn want to continue the bond of breastfeeding, why cut it short and force an abrupt end?

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  2. Friend...things are gonna be just fine!! The little peanut is gonna be just fine and beautiful!! :) And about the breastfeeding thing...the decision is ultimately up to you. You should do what you feel is best. Just consider your history...and might I just add that your doctor is an MD for a reason. And I don't think he'd suggest it unless he felt that for some reason it was medically necessary. Either way, you and both of your little bambinos are gonna be perfect!! Don't sweat the small stuff!! I love you!!

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I am so happy you are here. Your words make my heart so happy.

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